My daughter made me cry today

She & dh went out to get me a rose, and she sang a song she made up:

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who reads to me.

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who teaches me.

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who loves me.


(She got the idea from a poem we read the other day, "The Reading Mother" by Strickland W. Gillilan--in the Glorya Hale collection, An Illustrated Treasury of Read-Aloud Poems for Young People. Such a great poetry book!)

"The Reading Mother"

I had a mother who read to me
Sagas of pirates who scoured the sea.
Cutlasses clenched in their yellow teeth;
"Blackbirds" stowed in the hold beneath.

I had a Mother who read me lays
Of ancient and gallant and golden days;
Stories of Marmion and Ivanhoe,
Which every boy has a right to know.

I had a Mother who read me tales
Of Gelert the hound of the hills of Wales,
True to his trust till his tragic death,
Faithfulness lent with his final breath.

I had a Mother who read me the things
That wholesome life to the boy heart brings-
Stories that stir with an upward touch.
Oh, that each mother of boys were such!

You may have tangible wealth untold;
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be --
I had a Mother who read to me.

by Strickland W. Gillilan


Keep reading to your kids :-)

Merry :-)

Spelling Progress! All About Spelling Review

I have to share about a favorite curriculum!

We've tried several spelling programs here (including making up my own, which I found to be a very involved task!). But never found one we really loved or that "worked" for us. Then last Spring I stumbled across All About Spelling; it was everything I had wanted to create on my own and more.

My son (11) says that it's the most effective curriculum we've used. "It starts out basic and really makes you think about how words are spelled. Then it helps you to know how to spell tricky words. I like writing the words on the white board. It's fun because I like to see what I know and I like the trivia questions! (review cards). I like the time that I get to spend with Mom."

(No, I didn't pay him to say that last part, isn't he sweet?!) I agree that it's effective; every week I am noticing more words that my kids are spelling correctly in their writing that they didn't know how to spell before.

So, here is my All About Spelling review:

The things I like:

The letter tiles--these are similar to what we used in Reading Reflex, only these are laminated and color-coordinated. We use the magnets too and put them on a magnetic white board--this makes the program so user-friendly!



Not sure if you can read what Zach spelled on the board: I'm done with my book! We were both so proud!

The book is open and go, the lessons are all laid out. We work for about 15 minutes & then pick up there again the next day. I spent one day getting ready to teach it by punching out the perforated cards & just glancing at the book. Otherwise there is really no prep time.

Each new step begins with reviewing rules and words that still need reinforcing, then learning some new concepts and building words with the tiles. Later the kids can write words on a white board or on paper (or they can use more tactile methods). I really like that there are phrases and dictation sentences to write too--so the kids don't just memorize a list and then forget it, they have to think how to write words in a sentence. I think this is one reason that what my kids are learning is "sticking."

We can go as quickly or as slowly as we need to through each lesson, so my kids learn at their own pace. Some lessons (called "steps") have taken us 2 days, some have taken a week or so.


Here's Anna after finishing another lesson, with her progress chart. Obviously she loves "sticker day," LOL!

Review is built in so it won't be forgotten, and my kids retain what they are learning. It's completely customizeable--the rules and words are on cards that you keep in a card file, and when your kids have them mastered, you move the cards out of the review section.


Zach and his progress chart, done with Level 2!

It's based on the Orton Gillingham phonics research, and it only teaches rules that really hold true (no rules like "when two vowels go walking, the first one does the talking," which is only true about 40% of the time.) AAS also used the same research that another favorite book of mine--The ABC's and All Their Tricks--used.

It uses visual, auditory, and kinesthetic processes. Works for kids with dyslexia, auditory processing struggles (which we have dealt with) and other issues too.

AAS has a money back guarantee (that tipped the scales for me to try it! And they take paypal too, another plus).

There is a great Resource Center on the site with articles and videos for further help.

There is a jail for words that don't follow the rules!

We added magnets to the "jail" so we could put that on our board too! BTW, the board is 2' X 3' if you're wondering--the angle of this picture may make it look bigger.

AAS is easy to use and to understand. I only wish I had found it several years ago! I really can't think of much I'd change about it, and I've found that the author is very accessible and helpful. It might not be the program for everyone, but if you're looking for a better spelling program, check it out. I decided to become an affiliate because it's helped us so much. If I can answer any questions I'd be glad to. (I've been talking up AAS since before I knew they had an affiliate program because it made my kids enjoy and understand spelling. We're midway through book 2 and will start book 3 later this year.).

God bless, Merry :-)

1/6/09--I thought I'd add an update to this post, and some pictures! My kids still enjoy this, and their writing has improved so much. They can spell more words and if they do make a mistake, usually the mistake makes phonetic sense--no more simply "decorating with vowels" or adding extra letters because the word might need more!

They have a lot more confidence now and both have told me that reading is more fun too. I think AAS has helped with word-attack skills for bigger words, as well as helping with their speed. Zach actually read a huge Indiana Jones novel (with all four books in it). Back in September he told me that the first chapter in one of the books didn't make sense and didn't belong. After discussing how that couldn't be true, he put the book up for awhile and re-read it in November--and told me that now he could read it all and that it DID make sense! Zach is now in Level 3, and Anna is nearing the end of Level 2.

Want to see our "School Room?"

(The correct answer is yes after all the time we spent rearranging, plus finally--after 10 years! getting rid of the old blinds that came with the house & putting up curtains, and also cleaning out all the things that get "lost" under furniture, LOL! I sure sneezed a lot that first day!)

This room doubles as a family room/sitting room, and features our 18 year-old couches! (We found them one day when we went to Walmart for hairspray. Of course, I don't use hairspray, too allergic then & now so is Dave! but it was for an art project. Anyway, go in for hair spray, come out with couches, that's about how my life goes!). They've made it through 5 moves so far, LOL!

Here's what you see when you first come downstairs into this room:

You can see our magnet whiteboard with the All About Spelling tiles peeking out from behind the couch. Sometimes the kids do projects on the table. They used it a lot when they were smaller, it was just their size, LOL!

Looking to the left:

That's my grandpa's fiddle music on the piano stand there, I love it! But I need to find a way to restore it, the pages are all falling out, any ideas? I have some Reddi Roll that I could protect the cover with but I'm more concerned about all the inside pages falling apart.

Turning to the right:
Still need to go through the kids' art portfolios stashed between the book case and the hutch-turned-bookcase/school storage! On top of the bookcase you can see the candle setting from our wedding. We use that for "Tuesday Tea" when we read poetry & eat a snack. The top shelf (dubbed the "shelf of wonder" by Zac) houses our current year's books. We usually do our history and science and Bible reading in this room.

Now turn right again to look at the back of the room:
The kids like to write or eat breakfast here, and that's our buddy Lightning's cage down below (our hamster). The cowboy picture on the left is one Zac did several years ago in an art class. He was 7 I believe, and drew this while looking at a picture, then put black-colored glue on the lines & used oil pastels. That teacher was phenomenal at getting kids to draw!

I know, I need to update our family pictures, I do have a more recent one, I just haven't gotten it up yet--and how could I take down those sweet cherub faces anyway? Sigh. They do grow!

Thanks for visiting our school room! Merry :-)

Mini Office--Getting Ready for the School Year!

Well, we've been getting ready for the new school year to start and made these "mini offices." (A mini-office is a specific application of lap-booking, where you put together information they will use throughout the school year for their work). They were a lot of fun! I had the kids fill in their multiplication chart, names of shapes, prime numbers, Roman numerals, names of states etc... It was my sneaky way of doing some summer school ("really, this is a craft...").

Here's Zac's cover...

Anna's cover:

(She says that's a "Rainbow Crystal Cave" on the front of her's.)

Inside when you first open it up are some language arts tips.

(We hid magnets under the "COPS" on the left and the "run-away train" on the right; these hold the flaps closed. I saw something similar on another office online and the kids liked that idea, so we borrowed it!).

"COPS" is our acronym for editing--Capitalization, Organization (neatness etc...), Punctuation, and Spelling. Under that are "rule-breaker" words (We're using All About Spelling; they send rule-breakers to jail!) The right side shows sounds for OUGH, and the jobs of E.

On the middle panel, I remind them to "Spell with their ears (ie listen to the sounds/write the sounds) and Check with their eyes (did they choose the right phonogram for that word etc...)" I also had vowel sounds, which I thought might be a handy reference, but found them unnecessary after they learned them in AAS. 

The whole middle page flips up too, here's the inside fully opened:

I had the kids label all the states, and then in the middle is a place for them to record spelling, capitalization, and punctuation rules, plus samples of cursive letters, both caps and small letters.

The left flap has an additional tab that opens to show more "rule-breaker" words. The tab covers these up and has a place to put "this week's list" so they can study words that don't follow phonetic rules each week. I was going to make this a pocket on the flap, but then I saw that a dry-erase marker can write on and wipe off of the laminate, so we're going to try that instead. (This is another aspect we didn't end up needing to use).

This is the back:

I didn't take a pic of it fully opened, but all of the math concepts are on the back of the folder--so the items you saw on the cover picture show on the same side as the back when it's opened.

The kids had a lot of fun doing these and have thanked me about a zillion times, so I hope they'll be helpful this year! Both kids have already taken them to their own desks in their rooms, so I also hope they won't be lost before the school year starts, LOL!

Update: The math facts and how to spell math words ended up being the most used aspect of the mini-office for us. My daughter referred to hers for several years, actually.

Going to school with the queen mother...

Anna, the eternal princess has upped the ante now. Recently she has been seen turning in her assignments on one bended knee, bowing as one would before royalty. "Here you go, my queen!"
"Thank you my princess!"

Sigh. I know some day this stage will end. I hope it's not too soon!

Merry :-)

Evaluations part 2--Rough years, goals, and Meta Cognition

Lest anyone get the impression that all of our years are rosy (gee, I don't get to use the word "lest" very often!), we've had rougher evaluation times, and that's ok too. I think it really drew my kids and I closer together to evaluate each year, though we've only done orally in the past. They saw that I was willing to listen and take their thoughts and concerns into consideration.

Sometimes the changes suggested were not doable (No, sorry, we can't just not do math!), but then we were able to work through things and find something at least more palatable. As you can see, my son doesn't love math...but he no longer hates it! He no longer thinks we're using a curriculum that doesn't want children to understand math(he said that at age 6 about Miquon, LOL!). He's not asking to change curriculums--all he wants is for us to read instructions together (which is what I asked if he wanted at the beginning of the year and he said no--and so I've let him go at that).

But that's where trial & error, success & failure come in. I let him try his idea--and he sees now that he struggled with it, and realizes the advantages of doing it with mom. I often let my kids decide something if I can--how to do something or the order--this is their education & my dictating everything seems to stifle them. But in return, they are learning that mom knows some things, and sometimes it might be wise to follow what mom says.

And I am learning that sometimes they have some pretty great ideas, and hey, maybe we could do that. I'm so close to becoming stodgy some days it isn't funny! (ok, maybe a little funny!) They're willing to change things up. So...I go with it if I can. Finding out something won't work doesn't scare me--I think we all need the freedom to fail. And our kids will learn a lot from how we handle a failure, so nothing is wasted.

One thing I'm keeping in mind for next year. This year I went over just one main goal for my son--to make writing easier for him. (That's "kid-speak" for "let's learn how to write paragraph and multiple-paragraph papers this year," but he wouldn't have been interested in that!) He was able to remember that goal and go back and evaluate our year's LA based on that, how cool! So next year I think I might actually write down the goals (or have him write them), and let him be more a part of that process too.

For him to tell me which spelling he thinks will be more effective, and that he thinks he needs something else to memorize his science lessons, shows he's taking ownership of his education. That's what I want! To release my kids more and more to ownership. If homeschooling is something I do *to* my kids, I think we'll be in trouble by high school. This is their journey, and I'm a guide...but it's more and more becoming their journey.It also helps them...and me...learn about their styles, and better serve them as their teacher, and they better serve themselves as learners.

I learned a new term this spring...meta cognition. Basically--thinking about how we think. It's a skill that we can help our children develop that will foster a good education, and helps us focus on how to make things work. So, years ago when my son wanted to just dump math & I said we couldn't do that, but encouraged him that I would walk with him in this journey of finding a way to do math that would work for him--I was really asking him to analyze how he thinks, to begin to identify those things about himself and how he learns. We continue to build on that foundation. It's a good thing!

End-of-year evaluations...by my kids!

On Thursday I had my kids do written evaluations of our school year. We've done discussions like this orally in years past, so they know I take their comments seriously. I asked them to write what they liked, what went well, what they didn't like or was hard, and what they would like to change for next year.

Their responses just tickled me pink! Especially because they put time and thought in them. Anna took 45 minutes! (Note, I did not have them edit for spelling, they might have caught some of these if I had, but oh well, they're cute!).

Anna wrote:

I think that handriting is my favorit subjet.

wy?
1- Becas it is sumtimes short.
2- it is Bible versis
3- it is cersiv

My 2end favorit is math.

wy?
1-it is sumtimes esy
2-it is fun
3-I can do it werever I want. (later she expounded orally, "in the livingroom, in my room, downstairs, in the screen porch, on the swings..." LOL, I guess she really has done math in a lot of places!)

My 3rd favorit is spellin (LOL, we're working on it!)

wy?
1-we get to do it as a famly
2-the magnit letters
3-the magnit wite bord.

And everything is the same (I asked what this meant--everything else she likes the same.)

I [great big huge heart] scool!

As we were talking, she said school is fun and I said "I think so too, you make it fun for me too." (she does, most of the time!) Then she said she'd been thinking about how hard I work to make it fun & that she wants to make a "teacher gift" to thank me. What a sweetie! She also had nothing to change.

***

Zac wrote:

Things that went well
Bible
History
Reeding
Speling
Langwige Arts
Guitar

Things that didn't go so well

Sience-I forget lessons sometimes

Handwriteing-Hard to understand.

Math-confousing lessons sometimes

[insert a detailed drawing of one of the Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles here]

Math-Maybe reed instrucshens together and talk about what it meens. (Now that's funny--at the beginning of the year I offered to do that & he wanted to read them on his own! But good for him, he's thinking about how he learns!).

Handwriteing-help me understand reeding cursive

Sience-Make it easier to memorize lessons

As we talked later, he filled in some details--for science he wishes we had a 3-d model of the brain that he could take apart & put back together & memorize all of the parts (we're studying the body right now). But then we discussed what we'll be studying next year & how in 7th grade I'll split he & Anna for science & he'd be doing his own reading & writing for that--he was very excited about that. He actually said, "I figured this was just preparation for us and you would be splitting us up soon." Sometimes kids' thought processes just amaze me!

We also talked about getting more "gadgets" for him to take apart & make--things with motors or rubber-band powered (he said he could play with something rubber-band powered all day, LOL!). I asked about language arts and he said that now he likes writing! (just yesterday he used the words, "I don't mind writing," now he actually said likes! warmed this momma's heart). We're getting somewhere! That was one of our main goals this year--just to make writing easier.

Then I asked which spelling he liked (He's done Apples since January & All About Spelling the last 2 weeks). He said he liked both but thinks the "board" method (AAS uses a big magnet white board) will be more effective. I can't believe he thought that through, I'm impressed.

Well, try some evaluations with your kids and see what they say! Don't worry if it's not all positive--I'll post on that next.

Merry :-)

Kids Say...

The kids did some freewriting today on the topic, "What would you do if you found a magic wand?" (This was from the blog at http://www.bravewriter.com/). They had so much fun with these!

Zac's is ALL boy! He wrote:

I found a magic wand. I made 8 of every Nerf gun there is. Then I made 8 bikes that turn into speeders. I went to my friend's house and we had a dart gun fight. The darts flew through the air! Then more friends came and we teamed up and did what boys do best: fight fight and fight fight fight with dart guns. Then we had races again and again. And it was the Best day ever!

Anna wrote:

Where am I? There is so much sand here. I must be in the desert. I walked for miles and miles; then I saw it. It looked like the city of Egypt. I went inside the walls and saw a magic wand. It said, "make a wish and it will come true," so I made a wish: "I want to go home." And then I was home. And then I said, "Take away my Daddy's Lyme Disease." And after that I lived happily ever after. The end.

Loving our kids

Several years back I did something that was more transformational in my parenting--and my relationship with my husband--than almost anything else I can think of. I decided (really it was a God-thing, I think) to pray through I Corinthians 13:4-7 for that year. And since someone reminded me of that today, I thought I'd blog about some of my meditations during the months I prayed through this. As I recall, I prayed until September, but I decided to break it down a little further here:

In January I prayed through "Love is patient." Three little words...one huge task! "God, help me be patient when my kids are driving me nuts, when my husband is feeling sick and all I want is 5 minutes to myself." "God, am I patient? Show me where I am not patient, open my eyes that I can repent and submit that to you." Now, just so you know, if you pray for God to show you your weaknesses, He will! But He is the Father of all things Love, and if we need patience, he is the one to go to. "God, I'm out of patience--give me your patience so I can love my family."

February came, and I moved on: "Love is Kind." Are my words, my tone, my actions kind? Am I modelling the kind of kindness I hope my children will learn? God says that his kindness leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4). Does my kindness lead my children to repentance, does it inspire them to want to obey? And kindness is not doormat--sometimes the kindest thing to do for a child is to establish and enforce boundaries--if it is done with kindness, compassion, love, a desire to not just have things easy, but to do what's best for our family and for that child. "God, help me to be kind. That tone I used today--oh Lord it was full of selfishness, of me--it was not kind. Help me to do better."

Selfishness...yeah...that leads me to March. "It does not envy. It does not boast." Eight words, we're moving up! "But surely, God, I'm not envious, am I?" But every time I compare my kids with other kids in my mind, in creeps either envy or boasting. We look on the surface and think others have it better--or conversely perhaps that we are better--and what fruit do these musings bring? Do we unconsciously model sometimes the very selfishness we are trying to train out of our children? Does love motivate such thinking?

April--"It is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking." I guess God thought I needed another month on this theme! Rooting out pride is not easy, from our children, or from ourselves. But God never promised it would be easy. He did promise, He would be with us.

May--"It is not easily angered." I find I am not as easily angered if I keep on top of behavior issues--it's when I get lazy and ignore them and the frustration inside me builds that my anger can flare. I need to pull away, even for 5 minutes, to pray and read and get in the right frame of mind. "God, I know you are not easily angered--though sometimes I fear you will be! Help me to understand your grace and forgiveness towards me, and help me to show this to my children. Help me to train them."

June--"It keeps no record of wrongs." Hm, I remember times when I've said, "You always do this!" Yes, we parents keep records of wrongs!

July--"Love does not delight in evil, but always rejoices with the truth." What kind of a parent delights in evil? you might ask. Sheepishly raising hand. Sometimes I don't want to teach and train and discipline my children. Sometimes they make me downright angry and what I really want is revenge. A friend taught me to put "Mom" in the place of "man" in this verse:
"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,20 for [Mom's] anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." James 1:19-20 (NIV)

August--"It always protects." Do my actions protect my child, or my own interests? Conversely, sometimes the best protection for our children is to let them experience the consequences of their own actions.

September--"Always trusts." One of the most powerful articles I've ever read spoke of parents who believed in their son, and spoke into his life what they believed he could become. They trusted that he wanted to be a man of integrity and character, and they told him, even when he failed, that they knew he could grow up to be that kind of young man. Do we throw failure into our kids faces, or do we build them up by believing in them? Take a chronic sin issue and tell your child, "I believe in you. I know this is a struggle now--and I'm going to walk with you through this time. I know you can grow up to be a man/woman who is honest. Let's pray, and you let me know how I can help you with this."

October--"Always hopes." Do I have hope for my children? Or do I sometimes give up? Sometimes when I'm tempted to give up, I've been neglecting myself--after all, that's what self-sacrificing, "good" moms do, right? No, good moms take care of and invest in their child's most important resources--one of which is the child's mom. Hopelessness is almost a sure sign I'm not getting enough sleep and rest, or I'm not eating right & drinking enough water, or exercising, or spending time with the Lord...

November--"Always perseveres." "Lord give me strength when I want to give up!"

"Love never fails." A fun word-study is to search the Psalms for all the times it mentions God's unfailing love. We will fail--but He never does. Draw on His unending reserves of unfailing love daily, hourly, minute by minute.

May God give you grace and love and wisdom with your children, your husband, and those in your life. Merry :-)

Bookworm Bookmarks

The kids and I have been playing with yarn! Zach and Anna wanted to learn how to crochet while I read stories, so I got them started on some basic stitches while I worked on these little critters before and after reading aloud. 

I remember these "bookworms" from when I was a child; they make adorable bookmarks. This curly critter is as nosy as my kids, trying to read ahead in our book! 

We started reading Calico Bush yesterday morning, and just as we got to the scary part where the "wild woman" grabs the little girl...the second Midwest earthquake of the day made our couches vibrate and knickknacks rattle! We missed the first one, but the second sure added some excitement to our day!

Crocheting was a nice way to relax after all the commotion.

Of course, the kids followed that up with a squirt-gun fight in the rain...

Get it in Writing!

The kids and I have started interactive journalling. I tried a few years ago, but they really didn't have the writing skills or the interest yet to keep it up. This fall when my mom offered to buy a couple of books for us, I remembered this idea, and decided to pick up a journal for each of the kids. We're having so much fun!

A lot of the notes are "I love you, Mom!" but we also draw pictures to each other or say something funny, and I'm able to share things they do that bless me or make me proud of them. They love to read what I've written to them and respond back. Kids need lots of encouragement, and this is a great way to give them some.

Another benefit is that they are much more willing to write. Today when I was working on our Language Arts (changing passive verb sentences into ones with active verbs), I noticed Zac wasn't responding to my question--and he told me he was going to write it first and then tell me! This is my child who has been allergic to writing!

Now, I am a little sneaky, I admit, because we're secretly working on spelling too. I don't correct their spelling, but I notice words they misspell, and I try to use the words in my response, with the correct spelling of course. I've seen them start to spell several common words correctly through this. Gotta love those side benefits!

A great resource for encouraging all kinds of journalling is The Gift of Family Writing. Another favorite resource for encouraging writing in general, whether you homeschool or want to help your kids afterschool, is The Writer's Jungle.

Dave likes to write notes for the kids & hide them in their pants pockets for them to find, and they love this too. What things do you do to encourage your kids through writing?

Merry :-)

Why are you making us do this?

Last night we finished reading Johnny Tremain (don't worry, no spoilers!). The ending was appropriate...but not satisfying to my kids. "It can't end there!" "Is there a Johnny Tremain Two?" I often hear this at the end of books. Ending a book is like saying goodbye to your friends.

So today I decided to depart from our usual language arts, and told the kids to get paper and pencil. "Did we do something wrong? Why are you making us do this?" Hm, not the response I want for a writing assignment! True, I did recently make them copy I Corinthians 13:4-7 (the Love is patient...verses--very worthwhile!). Suddenly that translates into torture?

"No. You're going to write for 20 minutes, What happened next in Johnny Tremain?" After a few, "I can't do that!" and, "We'll die!" type responses (that's right, homeschool mom's sinister plan...death by writing!), they got excited about the idea and started writing.

Zac, the resident statistician, set his watch timer for the promised 20 minute maximum. The alarm went off to wails of, "I'm not done yet!" and "I think I need another piece of paper." Say WHAT? Ah, music to this mother's ears after years of wondering if they would ever enjoy writing! We focused more on copywork and dictation this year, and it has really increased their confidence.

They each took another 20 minutes to finish, and then we sat at the table and drank hot cocoa while they read their stories out loud. Zac even used a metaphor! Very cool. Persevere, my friends!

Merry :-)

Whose plan was this, anyway?

You know, I just wanted to get up and get school done today. We have an appointment at 2, and then AWANA tonight--we can't start late today. Can't things run like clockwork just because I want it?! (Ironically, when we DID finally get to school, we read Can't You Make Them Behave, King George, about George the Third and his trouble with America. He couldn't make the Americans fit into his neat and orderly plan either!)

So what was it that landed my daughter in tears (leading to lesson # 47 on women for my son--"was it something I said?" "No dear, sometimes girls are going to cry and you can't do anything about it, just make sure your words and actions are kind." This wasn't in MY curriculum today! But an important life lesson, I suppose, worth the digression).

The issue at hand? The top of our Christmas Tree. The one waiting in the closet to be put up. (The kids want it up yesterday, I want the leaves raked & some things done around the house first...) Since about September, Anna has been drawing stars in the margins of her math papers. Nighttime stars, Christmas trees with stars... "Stars, yay! Angels boo." It's not that she doesn't like angels--she just wants a star on the top of the Christmas tree.

I can relate. I grew up with a star on top of the tree. Something about a star on top seems right to me. Zac likes our angel. I made that angel before he was born. It's lovingly wrapped in tissue and placed in its own box each year to keep it fresh-looking. Zac likes to think that Mom made that angel. He likes tradition (hm...things to run like clockwork?). He likes angels and thinking about them protecting us. He likes the angel on top of our tree, and doesn't want a star.

This morning, instead of eating breakfast, the kids cut up a cardboard box. Zac was drawing a nativity scene. With a very large angel. Anna was perfecting her star. Scientifically mapping out how to make the sides exactly even, the lines straight. Planning how to cover it to make it shiny. Wondering how to attach it to the tree. And the tension was building.

Where's the wisdom of Solomon when you need it? Somehow I didn't think half a star & half an angel on top of the tree was going to solve this one. Put the angel on top & mount the star from the ceiling? Maybe. Put my foot down, say enough, we'll just keep the angel? No, that would seem like I'm choosing sides I could hear them arguing as I put laundry in the dryer. I said a quick prayer and returned to the craft-works kitchen.

Slowly, and quietly I said, "I have to talk to you children. I don't know what we're going to do about this Christmas tree topper. But we can't have this fighting. I'd rather not put up the tree than turn our Christmas season, which is supposed to be about peace and remembering why Jesus came to us, and love, and joy--into a season of fighting. Someone is going to have to give in, and not just outwardly, begrudgingly, but truly in their heart, give in and be happy about it."

That's when Anna's eyes filled with tears and she left the room. Oh yeah, we'll be getting to school REAL soon today! Were these heartbroken tears? Manipulative tears? I wasn't sure. After my little talk about women with Zac, he paused and asked, "Can I make a star for the tree too?"

ARGH! Is that what this was about?! "If you are feeling left out because Anna isn't including you in her plans to make a star, then you need to talk to her about that." Lightbulb. "I guess that IS what's bothering me about this." "Ok, well...go talk to her. You have 10 minutes and then we REALLY need to start school!"

They worked it out, the kids got breakfast, school got done, and they all lived happily ever after ...until Mom's next mental breakdown...

Merry :-)

What is Farkle?

"I fixed your blog for you," my dh said this morning.

"Oh? What was wrong with it?" I asked, feeling a bit scared.
"It said you live in Afghanistan!"

Oops. I guess that's the first-on-the-list default choice, LOL! I wonder how many of the Afghani bloggers are really from somewhere else?!

Well, on to Farkle. Some call this game "10,000." Dh and I played in college, it's a fun, fast-paced dice game. I recently taught our kids, and they are hooked! There are several variations on how to play and score points (just google "Farkle rules"), but here are our family rules:

You'll need: 6 dice, a pen and paper.

Play: Each player takes turns rolling the dice. Each time you roll, you have to remove at least one die that is worth points (I'll list the point values below). Then you have to decide whether to score those points or roll the remaining dice, trying to get more points. If you get more points, you can keep rolling, but if your re-rolled dice have no value, you lose all points that you would have earned that round.

Point Values:
1-100
5-50
3 of a kind (in one roll, not cumulative) = 100 times that number (ie, 3 2's = 200).
4 of a kind = the above points plus 100 (ie, 4 2's = 200 plus 100 = 300)
3 1's is 1000
3 pairs (ie 2 2's, 2 4's & 2 5's for example) = 500 points
6-straight (1-2-3-4-5-6 in ONE roll) = 1500 points
Farkle-no points at all rolled, lose your turn.

Example: Role 6 dice & get 3 5's, a 4 and 2 6's. Set the 3 5's aside, that's 500 points. You can decide to stop and rack up 500 points, or you can gamble and roll the remaining 3 dice. Let's say you roll again, a 1, a 5, and a 2. You pull out the 1, that's 100 points, and the 5, that's 50 points, so now you're up to 650. You decide that's enough & stop, so you now officially add those 650 points to your written score. If you rolled again & got, say, a 2--well, you lose those 650 points, pass the dice to your left, so sad for you.

However--let's say you gamble, roll that last die, and get a 1--now you're up to 750 points, you've used up all 6 dice--you can pick ALL the dice up and roll them all again, and keep adding points!

Additional rule--we play that to get on the score board initially, you have to start with a minimum of 1000 points--so you have to keep rolling until you get 1000 or more for that first score, or until you lose your points & your turn. Once you are on the score board, you can stop at any point value you want.

To win: As you may have guessed by the alternate title, you need 10,000 cumulative points or to win. Once you hit or pass 10,000, everyone else gets one more turn. They have to roll until they can beat your point total (thus winning themselves) or until they don't score & get no points for that round.

This is a really fun way to encourage kids to use their addition skills, as well as teaching them about probability! Plus--it's just plain fun. Enjoy! Merry :-)

I know what the problem is, Mom!

Here I am, starting my first blog and hoping I've not completely lost my mind. Hold the comments on that thought please! Gee, I can see one has to be VERY careful in how they go about things in blogland!

So, I guess I'll start with a story...about story problems. Yeah, math. Specifically Anna's. They were all wrong yesterday--she added instead of subtracting. So I called her to me and had her read the problems to me. She stumbled a bit on the names & on one other word, but she understood the meaning of the problem. I could tell by the big, "OOOOOOOhhhhh" as she read them.

I encouraged her (after helping her with the names and the word cabbage--why do they do word problems on cabbage? If the word had been chocolate, I'm sure she could have read it!) that she could always come ask me what a word means if she doesn't know it. Then she said, "I know what the problem is mom. I don't ever read the words, I just assume it's adding!" Oh my goodness, I think we laughed for 5 minutes!

Zach was in the room, and he had to chime in, "Yeah, Anna, the words aren't there just to fill up the page and make it look pretty." Hmmm, I wonder who could have put an idea like that in his head?

I think little moments like these are gifts from God--an opportunity to make a connection with our kids. It could just as easily have been a moment of frustration or impatience on my part, and driven a wedge between my daughter and I. But in laughter we can find healing and family-bonding.

What can you do to make a connection with your kids today?

Merry :-)