Gerbils, Spies, and a Deprived Mother

"I've been a VERY good mommy this year!"

That's what I told my husband when I found this highly suspicious article in the freezer:

highly suspicious unnamed food item

"Tomorrow's Mother's Day.  Keep out."

Such cold-hearted words!

"You know, honey, if we followed the Jewish schedule, Mother's Day would start now."  Bat-bat (eyes).  Smile sweetly.

It wasn't working.  I tried the good mother bit again.

"How would you explain it to the kids?  They want you to be surprised tomorrow!"

"Easy.  Gerbils.  Stuart and Rocka can be VERY naughty boys!"  Now truly, this is a somewhat believable argument.  Oh sure, they LOOK innocent enough here...

Rocka (left) named after the Hero Factory hero,
and Stuart (right) for Stuart Little.

...but they could do it all right.  They're already eating themselves out of house and home:

Stuart sampling his house...

This was solid house before they got a hold of it, the true entrance is on the other side.  Shall we make little footprints in the (hopefully ice cream) in the freezer and be done with this?

Standing Guard...

"Hold it right there, Ma'am!"

"What?"

Secret Agent...

"Agent Gibbs?  Yes, I've apprehended the suspect.

Whatever's in there must be finger-waggin' good!

 "Uh-uh-uhhh.  Not this time!  Mother's Day doesn't start until tomorrow and by that I mean AFTER 12:00 noon!  Maybe 5:00 pm!"

I've been warned...

 "Go!"

Notice he couldn't resist a smirk!

Sigh.  Still no ice cream until tomorrow...

Happy Mother's Day everyone!

Find out what was in the bag!

Being Watchful

Last night I noticed that the kitchen garbage was empty. And I smiled to myself, because I knew my son had taken it out without being told. Duly noted, I hadn't mentioned it to my son, but he made sure to bring it up today. And it gave me such a great opportunity to affirm him. "I know you don't like me calling you a 'young man,' but it's a mark of becoming a man to see a need and take the initiative to take care of it without being told." He said, "thanks," in a way that let me know, maybe he didn't mind the "young man" status so much.

"The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." Proverbs 14:1.

I think as mothers that we have to be watchful for opportunities like these. It's so easy to focus on the times kids don't do what they're told or that they have to be told...that we can miss the fact that they are young, growing persons who need to be affirmed, who need to see what it is to be a man or a woman, who need to be respected for their growth and not torn down for their failures. They need to know they can make us smile and make us proud.

My daughter made me cry today

She & dh went out to get me a rose, and she sang a song she made up:

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who reads to me.

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who teaches me.

There is no one richer than me, richer than me, richer than me. There is no one richer than me, because I have a mom who loves me.


(She got the idea from a poem we read the other day, "The Reading Mother" by Strickland W. Gillilan--in the Glorya Hale collection, An Illustrated Treasury of Read-Aloud Poems for Young People. Such a great poetry book!)

"The Reading Mother"

I had a mother who read to me
Sagas of pirates who scoured the sea.
Cutlasses clenched in their yellow teeth;
"Blackbirds" stowed in the hold beneath.

I had a Mother who read me lays
Of ancient and gallant and golden days;
Stories of Marmion and Ivanhoe,
Which every boy has a right to know.

I had a Mother who read me tales
Of Gelert the hound of the hills of Wales,
True to his trust till his tragic death,
Faithfulness lent with his final breath.

I had a Mother who read me the things
That wholesome life to the boy heart brings-
Stories that stir with an upward touch.
Oh, that each mother of boys were such!

You may have tangible wealth untold;
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be --
I had a Mother who read to me.

by Strickland W. Gillilan


Keep reading to your kids :-)

Merry :-)

Annoying little sisters...

Kids!

Hubby and I were laying down this evening (I wasn't feeling the best) and of course there was a ruckus in the livingroom. So I went to see what was going on, and found dd crying & ds lecturing.

Me: So what's going on here?

Zach: I admit it, it was my fault. Anna was calling me mommy over and over and it annoyed me so I hit her with a pillow & hurt her nose.

Me: [thinking hmmm, not quite as annoying as the perfume I used to spray my brother with, but still, a great way to get a brother's goat!] Anna, is that what happened?

Anna: He also hit me on the head with his hand. And I hit his hand.

Me: So...why were you calling your brother 'mommy?'

Anna: [pause] To annoy him.

At this point I burst out laughing, and eventually both kids started laughing too. My son, who has been trying very hard since his week at camp to not let little things annoy him, let out this huge sigh.

Zach: So THAT's why! Here I thought it was all my fault for getting annoyed, and that was the point!

Oh, I laughed all that much harder! Here the poor boy (who has grown spiritually leaps and bounds lately) thought he just wasn't doing a good enough job of keeping himself from getting annoyed, when she meant it all along!

We had a good talk on communicating what we're really feeling (dd was tired of watching the video & wanted to do something fun together), and how to respond (assume she's annoying him for a reason & ask if she wants some attention instead of hitting as a response).

Whew. Glad that's settled. For today anyway...

Merry (a recovered annoying little sister, but now a sometimes annoying wife and mother...) :-)

Loving our kids

Several years back I did something that was more transformational in my parenting--and my relationship with my husband--than almost anything else I can think of. I decided (really it was a God-thing, I think) to pray through I Corinthians 13:4-7 for that year. And since someone reminded me of that today, I thought I'd blog about some of my meditations during the months I prayed through this. As I recall, I prayed until September, but I decided to break it down a little further here:

In January I prayed through "Love is patient." Three little words...one huge task! "God, help me be patient when my kids are driving me nuts, when my husband is feeling sick and all I want is 5 minutes to myself." "God, am I patient? Show me where I am not patient, open my eyes that I can repent and submit that to you." Now, just so you know, if you pray for God to show you your weaknesses, He will! But He is the Father of all things Love, and if we need patience, he is the one to go to. "God, I'm out of patience--give me your patience so I can love my family."

February came, and I moved on: "Love is Kind." Are my words, my tone, my actions kind? Am I modelling the kind of kindness I hope my children will learn? God says that his kindness leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4). Does my kindness lead my children to repentance, does it inspire them to want to obey? And kindness is not doormat--sometimes the kindest thing to do for a child is to establish and enforce boundaries--if it is done with kindness, compassion, love, a desire to not just have things easy, but to do what's best for our family and for that child. "God, help me to be kind. That tone I used today--oh Lord it was full of selfishness, of me--it was not kind. Help me to do better."

Selfishness...yeah...that leads me to March. "It does not envy. It does not boast." Eight words, we're moving up! "But surely, God, I'm not envious, am I?" But every time I compare my kids with other kids in my mind, in creeps either envy or boasting. We look on the surface and think others have it better--or conversely perhaps that we are better--and what fruit do these musings bring? Do we unconsciously model sometimes the very selfishness we are trying to train out of our children? Does love motivate such thinking?

April--"It is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking." I guess God thought I needed another month on this theme! Rooting out pride is not easy, from our children, or from ourselves. But God never promised it would be easy. He did promise, He would be with us.

May--"It is not easily angered." I find I am not as easily angered if I keep on top of behavior issues--it's when I get lazy and ignore them and the frustration inside me builds that my anger can flare. I need to pull away, even for 5 minutes, to pray and read and get in the right frame of mind. "God, I know you are not easily angered--though sometimes I fear you will be! Help me to understand your grace and forgiveness towards me, and help me to show this to my children. Help me to train them."

June--"It keeps no record of wrongs." Hm, I remember times when I've said, "You always do this!" Yes, we parents keep records of wrongs!

July--"Love does not delight in evil, but always rejoices with the truth." What kind of a parent delights in evil? you might ask. Sheepishly raising hand. Sometimes I don't want to teach and train and discipline my children. Sometimes they make me downright angry and what I really want is revenge. A friend taught me to put "Mom" in the place of "man" in this verse:
"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,20 for [Mom's] anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." James 1:19-20 (NIV)

August--"It always protects." Do my actions protect my child, or my own interests? Conversely, sometimes the best protection for our children is to let them experience the consequences of their own actions.

September--"Always trusts." One of the most powerful articles I've ever read spoke of parents who believed in their son, and spoke into his life what they believed he could become. They trusted that he wanted to be a man of integrity and character, and they told him, even when he failed, that they knew he could grow up to be that kind of young man. Do we throw failure into our kids faces, or do we build them up by believing in them? Take a chronic sin issue and tell your child, "I believe in you. I know this is a struggle now--and I'm going to walk with you through this time. I know you can grow up to be a man/woman who is honest. Let's pray, and you let me know how I can help you with this."

October--"Always hopes." Do I have hope for my children? Or do I sometimes give up? Sometimes when I'm tempted to give up, I've been neglecting myself--after all, that's what self-sacrificing, "good" moms do, right? No, good moms take care of and invest in their child's most important resources--one of which is the child's mom. Hopelessness is almost a sure sign I'm not getting enough sleep and rest, or I'm not eating right & drinking enough water, or exercising, or spending time with the Lord...

November--"Always perseveres." "Lord give me strength when I want to give up!"

"Love never fails." A fun word-study is to search the Psalms for all the times it mentions God's unfailing love. We will fail--but He never does. Draw on His unending reserves of unfailing love daily, hourly, minute by minute.

May God give you grace and love and wisdom with your children, your husband, and those in your life. Merry :-)